Foreign Love
by Aerrow
Summary: AU. Foreign exchange students always seem odd. But these two happen to be the most sane in the town of South Park. Summary is crap. Rating may go up. Discontinued.
1. Arriving in Hell

"Death to America!"

"Dumbass." Ruby muttered as the scantily clad man ran by, the American flag flowing behind him, sputtering yellow and red flames as it waved.

"Ruby, everyone here is a dumbass." Craig said as they traveled through the city of Iquitos, the capital city of the Loreto region. The red head just sighed and nodded slightly before jerking her hand up, hoping to catch the attention of the "cab" driver.

The cab man stopped right beside them, just in time. "Hello. Where would you two youngsters like to go?"

"We'll just get off and pay when we get there." Craig told the cab driver as he helped his little sister, and their bags, into the back of the cab. "Off to the south we go!" Ruby exclaimed, standing up and pointing to the sky. The cab driver just chuckled before riding off south and out of Iquitos.

It had taken them seven hours, ten cab changes and almost three-hundred dollars before they had arrived at their own little hometown, Omaguas.

"And that, my dear brother, is why I hate shopping day!" Ruby growled, barging into their small house, dumping the multiple bags on the counter and table. Craig nodded slightly, pulling his blue hat off before he sat down at the table, rummaging through the bags. "Just be glad we only have to go once a month."

"Well once a month is to fucking much." Ruby muttered, pushing Craig's bangs out of his face. The older quickly undid her work by shaking his head. "You know, if you wanted, you could be dating anyone you wanted."

"Like Bill Gates? No…wait…BILL CLINTON!" Craig shouted, throwing his arms up in exasperation. Ruby grinned and shook her head. "Nooo. I mean someone…nice. Someone who deserves to fuck my brother."

Craig blushed, but not before shoving his hat in his sisters face. "Oh shut up you little fire cracker." Said girl quickly dodged and stuck her tongue out at the older. "Never you fucking panda."

The blackette just stared at her.

"What?" Ruby asked.

"Panda?"

"Oh go to hell!" Ruby yelled, throwing the boy's brand new package of pudding cups at him.

Craig dodged, laughing hysterically before he got hit in the face with a bag of cookies.

* * *

"Craig! Ruby! Get your asses down here!" Mr. Tucker shouted from his seat at the table. The oldest walked down the steps slowly, his sister thrown over his back. "Put your sister down." Craig did as his father told him. "Not drop you dumbass." Ruby muttered from her place on the thread bare carpet, rubbing the sleepiness from her eyes. Why the hell did the fat ass have to wake them up at four in the fucking morning?

"You're both going to be exchange students in Colorado for the rest of the school year. Go pack your bags." Mrs. Tucker stated, flipping her blonde hair back. Craig and Ruby just stood there staring at her. "What are you two doing? Start packing!"

Craig drug Ruby up the stairs, the girl just let herself get tugged up the dirty steps. "God dammit Ruby! Get up the stairs yourself. I'm not a god damn football player."

"American wise: Soccer or Football?"

"Football."

"Yeah you're right. You're too skinny, pale, and overall fuckable to be an American football player."

"Ruby!"

"Whaaaaaaat? You know it's true."

"Get off your fucking asses and pack your god damn bags!"

Craig and Ruby quickly walked up the dusty wood steps and ran to their respective rooms to pack their bags.

"Fuckable~" Ruby sang from her room.

"RUBY!" Craig growled loudly enough for her to hear from down and across the hallway.

* * *

The two siblings were currently on their however long plane flight to South Park, Colorado. Craig sighed as Ruby, once again, tried to make his hair look more girly. Ruby growled as she, once again, failed at making his hair stay in a pony tail.

"Try pig tails. They're easier." Craig muttered as he searched through one of the lame catalogs. Ruby looked up at him, shocked. "I never thought of that!" She said excitedly, bouncing slightly in her seat before she grabbed more scrunchies from her carry-on bag. The redhead giggled evilly, turning to her brother, holding up some sparkly pink ones.

Craig looked over at her through the corner of his eyes, grunting as she continued giggling. He shrugged, looking back at the catalog. "Just take them out before we get off the plane."

Ruby squealed, causing some passengers to stare at her, before turning to her older brother, starting to work on putting his hair into pig tails.

* * *

Stan looked up from his cereal as his mother ran up and down the stairs, back and forth across the living room, and, if it was possible, probably in circles on the ceiling. He turned to look over at his older sister. Shelly just shook her head as their mother ran around the house, mumbling things under her breath while she freaked out about one thing or another.

Their dad walked in, his shirt half tucked into his pants while only one of his shoes was on. "What's wrong Sharon?" He yawned, having just woken up from his nap on the couch.

Sharon halted, staring at her husband in horror. "Randy! You were supposed to pick up the kids!"

Randy jumped slightly, finally remembering, before running up to the room to get dressed properly. A few minutes later, he ran down the stairs, almost tripping on the way down, dressed as good as new. He grabbed the keys before running out to the car.

Stan and Shelly watched amusedly as he turned around halfway down the street before driving past the house in the right direction. "Wait….we don't have school today….and we're right here." Stan mumbled, looking up at his older sister.

She shrugged, grabbing her glass of orange juice, before making her way up the stairs to her room. "Turd."

The younger sighed, turning back to look out the window.

* * *

Ruby grunted as Craig finally toppled over, asleep, into her lap. The redhead stared as he sprawled himself out across the few open chairs in the waiting area of gate B16. The so-called "Marshes" that were supposed to pick them up an hour ago….had yet to arrive. She giggled as her older brother grunted in his sleep, mumbling "pudding cups" under his breath. _'Same old Craig.'_ She thought.

She looked up as a man ran into the gate area, huffing slightly. He made his way up to the desk clerk, talking to the brunette who, for some reason, pointed to Ruby and her brother. The man nodded before walking up to the two.

"Sorry I'm late," He said, rubbing the back of his neck nervously, "I'm Randy Marsh. I was supposed to pick you up."

Ruby just nodded, pushing Craig off of her and onto the floor, before picking up her carry-on. She and Mr. Mar- Randy looked down at her older brother, on the ground, still sleeping. "I swear, he'd sleep through bulls stampeding through his room."

Randy just nodded, smiling slightly as he picked up the sleeping boy while Ruby grabbed his carry-on. The two made their way to the baggage claim. After grabbing their bags, Ruby pushed the 'kart' as she and Randy, still carrying her brother, made their way to the car.

After shoving the bags in the trunk and Craig in the back seat, Ruby sat in the front passenger as Randy drove them to their home for the rest of the school year. Boy were they in for a shock.

* * *

I've been working on this one chapter on and off for about a month. Maybe two. Don't remember. Hope you enjoy it.


	2. First Days are always the worst

"Wakey, wakey sleepy head!" Ruby shouted as she ran out of one of the quest rooms, bag in hand. Stan and Shelly walked into the living room from their places in the kitchen. They stood at the base of the stairs as the redheaded girl ran past the top of the stairs. "So this is what we have to wake up to for now on huh?" Stan mumbled, turning to look at his sister. Shelly just shrugged before going back to sit at the kitchen table.

Stan sighed, sitting down in his previous spot as well. "Come back here you cunt face!"

"Never faggot!"

Shelly and Stan looked towards the entrance to the kitchen as the foreign exchange girl came in, being followed by a half naked boy. Ruby stuck her tongue out at the boy as she stood behind the younger sibling. Sharon came in soon after, holding up some clothes. "You may want to get dressed Craig-honey."

"Oh come on. He doesn't give a shit about anything. Seriously, he could walk around school completely naked and not bat an eye."

"I've done that before."

"Oh yeah." Ruby stated as Craig advanced towards her, running off before he could grab a hold of her. "God dammit Ruby!" He shouted, resuming chasing her around the house just to get his bag back. Ruby giggled as she darted up the stairs, he brother in tow. "Dude! Since when could you run so fast?"

"Since you started stealing my shit!"

The younger Tucker sibling just giggled loudly as she darted back into the bathroom, slamming the door and locking it successfully before Craig rammed into it, staggering backwards from the impact. "Ruby!"

"What's the big deal anyway? It's just a couple clothes." Randy said as he walked up to the still half naked Craig, coffee in hand. Craig grunted as he made his way back to his room for the year. "He gone?" Ruby asked through the door.

"Mhmm." Randy nodded as the older Tucker sibling slammed the door to his temporary room. Ruby shyly opened the door to the bathroom, pecking both ways before she opened it all the way. "The big deal is that these are his _favorite_ clothes. You know, all black with chains and shit." Ruby muttered as she slowly tip-toed her way to her room, which was one down from her brother's.

Before she could make it though, Craig slammed the door open and tackled her to the ground. Ruby squealed as her brother started giving her a noogie. "Dude! Not fair."

"Life's not fair."

"Touché."

* * *

The group of four made their way through the hallways of Park High, stopping at their lockers. "So….foreign exchange students?" Kenny asked, happy he was alive to meet the new suckers- I mean students. Stan just nodded as he grabbed his science book out of his tiny-as-shit locker.

"So what they look like?"

"Well the girl is short, probably about Ike's age. The boy….dunno. Only seen him once and I was too distracted trying not to get a bloody nose to get a good look at him."

"Bloody nose, huh? Bet you were imagining him naked." The slightly older blond said, wagging his eyebrows.

"He was naked. Well…partially. He'd just taken a shower and his sister, Ruby, stole his clothes."

"Nice." Kenny whispered, bringing up a mental image. Cartman just huffed. "Sounds like a complete pussy."

Kyle was about to say something but was cut off by the warning bell. "Well, looks like it's time for school." Kenny and Cartman grumbled as the four made their way to science class.

Once everyone had sat down; Stan and Kyle next to each other, Kenny and Cartman behind them, the other boys off to the left and the girls in front of them, not to mention Ike, Kyle's younger adopted brother, was sitting next to the redhead, Mr. What's-his-face stood up and motioned for everyone to be quiet. Once that was accomplished, he motioned towards the door.

"Today," He started off, "We have two new students. Now these are foreign exchange students so don't be rude. Now, will you two please come in?" Everyone was dead silent as they waited for the two new students to come in through the door. They were startled when someone ran into the door before it was thrown open, a huffing redheaded girl, dressed up in a blue sweater and simple brown shorts, coming through. "You are such an ass!"

"Now, please Miss Tucker. No swearing."

Ruby looked up at the science teacher and stared at him for a few minutes. "I hate you already." She stated simply, moving to sit down in one of the few available seats, in front of Kyle. "Uh…wouldn't you like to introduce yourself…Miss Tucker?"

The redhead stood up from her seat and shouted "Oh yeah!" Before she turned to the still open door, glaring at it. "If you don't come in here, Craig-honey, I'm going to kick your ass into next week."

Some grumbling was heard before an almost exact replica of Stan, wearing black baggy pants complete with three chains, dark blue short-sleeved T-Shirt with a black long-sleeved shirt under it, and a complimentary blue chullo hat, walked into the door and sat down next to his sister, in front of Jesus- I mean Stan. "Okay," the younger sibling started, "I am Ruby Tucker, okay you bunch of idiots? And this," pointing to Craig, she continued, "Is my older brother. If he flips you off, don't worry, he doesn't it to everyone."

Craig just rolled his eyes as a couple of girls looked at him, giggling. "Oh, and he's gay." Ruby stated, rolling a piece of paper into a ball and throwing it at the closest girl, Bebe. "We have lived in Peru our entire lives," As Cartman was about to say something, Ruby threw a piece of paper at him as well, "And our parents are total dickheads. Thank you very much." She finished, sitting down.

"You are such a moron." Craig muttered, leaning forward on his desk and laying his head down on his folded arms. "Hey! I'm smarter than all these idiots here!" Ruby whisper-shouted while Kyle and Ike started chuckling. "Hey, I'm Kyle." The Jew stated, leaning forward slightly and offering his hand to the siblings. Craig just flipped him off, turning to look at the board at the front of the class. Ruby shook the other redhead's hand. "Nice to meet you." She whispered before turning to Ike. "Hi." She said simply, smiling at the younger Canadian.

Ike blushed slightly, moving to burry himself inside his open book. Kyle nudged Stan and the two looked over at the blushing genius. "Looks like Ike has a girlfriend~" Stan sang quietly before a pencil was thrown at him. "Shut up." The Canadian growled at him before continuing to hide his face.

"Shut up." The three turned to look at the older sibling in front of them who had turned around to glare at them. "I'm trying to fucking sleep." The Broflovski siblings nodded slowly, going back to their work while Stan just stared at the back of Craig's head, trying to not look down. (1)

* * *

It was now gym and Craig – being the happy camper he was – was brooding on the bleachers, leaning forward with his forearms on his knees. Oh the joys of high school gym. All you have to do is show up. Craig silently wondered how he made it through elementary and middle school knowing that the dreaded gym room was waiting for him around the corner. He shivered slightly. (2)

He glared as a brunette plopped down beside him, grinning. "Hiya! Names Clyde. What's yours?" He exclaimed, holding out his hand to shake.

"Leave me alone." The blackette muttered, raising his hand and flipped him off. Clyde's smile wavered slightly, but he just continued to be a little ball of sunshine. Just then, Kenny decided to spare his friend some suffering – Him and Craig shared math and they hit it off pretty quickly – and sat down next to Clyde, pushing him off the bleachers.

With the brunette out of the way, he slid closer to Craig. "Hey." You should just barely hear him from inside his large parka hood. "Don't you ever take that off?" Craig questioned, turning to look at him, now sitting cross legged.

"Nope!" Kenny said excitedly, his eyes turning up in an amused expression. Craig just rolled his eyes, looking off to the side to glance at the jocks who were openly partaking in the sports activity.

Suddenly, he felt a presence in front of him and when he looked forward, Kenny was only a mere inch away from his face. Staring at each other, Craig ready to either fall backwards from the lack of movement or smack the blond silly for getting so close.

"You have pretty eyes." The blond stated, causing Craig to blush slightly, huffing before he pushed Kenny off of the bleachers. "Ey!" He shouted as he tumbled to the floor, multiple turning to look at the disturbance. Kenny grumbled as he got up from the floor while Craig flipped off the crowd, getting up himself before making his way to the drinking fountain.

"Dude. You haven't done 'nothing."

"Still thirsty." Craig mumbled, leaning forward, holding his bangs back with one hand and pressing to button with his other. Kenny came up behind him and started rubbing the blackette's ass with his crotch. "Mind if we…go farther?" The blond asked, his face-splitting grin hiding behind his orange hood.

Craig pushed back slightly, continuing to drink from the fountain, before he stood up abruptly, turning around and smacking the blond upside the head. "Do that again and you're dead."

Kenny grinned. "Happens once a week."

The shorter of the two stared at the blond, face blank of any emotion. They stayed like that for a few moments before Craig grinned slightly. "You're fucking awesome."

* * *

1) The seats are those really shitty ones with half a back seat. So if Stan looked down, he'd be staring at Craig's ass.

2) These are my own thoughts. Gym in the bane of my existence. D:

Crappy way to end a chapter but I DON'T CARE. Ignore any and all grammar mistakes. Please and thank you. Reviews make me write faster. Leave some.

I don't own South Park. If I did, all the males would be gay and the girls would be slowly rotting in a deep dark pit. (No offense.)


End file.
